No one asked… but I’ve been spending a lot of my time in FL, while away on a short term project, digging into building a more stable life for myself. I keep calling it my “FL Retreat.” I’m taking this time to really create a life and schedule that will be manageable for when I get back to New York next week. I’ve been busy with the show, for sure, but I’ve slowly been giving myself the outlet and time to really hone in on the little things I can do in life that will make all of the difference.
What does this mean for me?
Well, life is short. Things can get overwhelming - especially when they build up over time. I’ve spoken a lot in past blogs about “maintaining consistency” in my life when things are constantly changing. This page primarily speaks to actors, but I believe the little things I have incorporated into my every day will make a difference to all kinds of people, careers and life patterns.
Below, I’ve shared some of these with you. If they don’t relate, that’s okay! Not everything works for everyone… life is different for everyone and different experiences and/or trauma’s may allow you to be more open to some things and closed to others. Even if you find just one thing that might enhance your life by including it into your day to day, I’ll be thrilled.
This list genuinely changed my life.
These are ways I’ve slowly started changing my life:
1. Working out every day. I’ve found a love for Pilates… specifically because as a dancer, it has so many other benefits - posture, flexibility, etc. On top of my love for pilates, working out every day has forced me to become more of a morning person (which I am not at all). I have a very busy lifestyle and my time is occupied majority of the time. Forcing myself to find an hour in the mornings for cardio/pilates has gotten me out of bed quicker and therefore more productive throughout the day.
2. This is a big one… I forgave the people I was holding grudges with. This does NOT mean I actually had conversations with majority of these people. I think that’s an important note. Protecting my peace has been a big part of my growth and a lot of conversations don’t necessarily need to be had for me to give myself closure. BUT - I had a lot of forgiving to do and things to let go of. To be honest, some of this included me needing to forgive myself. Whatever this means for you, I encourage you to let these things go. Make room for forgiveness and more room will open for love and opportunity in other directions. I believe you can’t truly generate love and positivity until you love yourself most!! Take that if nothing else!
3. Drinking significantly less alcohol. I think this is pretty straightforward. I don’t judge ever, but specifically not when it comes to alcohol. I just noticed a big difference when I started drinking 1-2 glasses a wine per week vs. a day!! Energy, focus and lots of other benefits.
4. EATING BETTER - wow!! The rumors are true. I hate that this is true. I have always been a girl who will workout simply “because I want to be able to eat whatever I want”, but the difference in my energy and protection from getting sick has been indescribably enhanced ever since prioritizing eating healthy and having a better diet.
5. Skincare / Haircare! Give yourself a solid skincare / hair care routine. I feel 100% better about myself when I take care of myself and wake up looking fabulous :)
6. Strengthening my friendships and not necessarily “being a friend to everyone.” This is something I had to learn over time. I’ve always been sensitive about “maintaining” relationships and keeping peace. I never wanted to be the bad guy or cut people off, but sometimes that may just be the best thing to do. It doesn’t have to be messy or even communicated necessarily. I’ve just gotten to a point where I prioritize friendships with people who prioritize me as much as I do them. Sometimes that is harder to find and harder to do than you can imagine… but oh, how my friendships got stronger. That support system is so real!!!
7. Prioritizing spending time with my family. Maybe this came with age, but when I used to come home from college and NYC, I spent a lot of time with many friends here and there. Therefore, not as much with my family. Over time, I’ve been spending so much time with my family when I’m home and it makes me feel so good and fulfilled. Of course, I set aside time to see friends, but I have spent significantly more time with my parents and grandparents. I know how much it will mean to me in the future.
8. Having fun with my financials. Saving is FUN! I’m a shopaholic at heart, so this is a big one for me. I still have this tendency but I’ve also had a lot of fun seeing my savings grow and I am REMARKABLY less stressed having a savings account to potentially fall back on when I need it. My industry is hard financially, but I feel much better being prepared for it. (Not to mention all of the vacations I can now afford to go on)!!
9. Quality over quantity (clothes, skincare, makeup). I feel like this statement is important in many different areas of ones life, but I’ve seen it do wonders in the area of clothing, makeup and skincare. I don’t need hundreds of skincare products or makeup bottles… I’ve learned over time what benefits me and what doesn’t, so I stick to the facts and I spend money on more useful/expensive products and less on bulk things I will only use/wear once! Don’t fix what isn’t broken ;)
10. GENUINELY taking my weekends off. Maybe this is a normal thing? I’m not sure. As an actress, I’ve always struggled with taking time off and always feel like I’m not doing enough. Sometimes there are exceptions to this one… like, if I have a last minute self tape to do or I’m doing double shows on the weekends, like I am now. BUT, when I have the opportunity to truly rest on the weekends, I’ve been taking it!
11. Less time on my phone and more time on my laptop. Scrolling on Tik Tok is a literal addiction. I’ve been there - still am sometimes… but instead of scrolling on my phone, I have tried to move that time over to my laptop where I scroll on casting websites, catching up on work, etc. The ‘screen time’ feels more valuable and like I’m actually getting things done. But absolutely no judgement on the Tik Tok drug, because me too…
12. Journaling. Need I say more?
13. Fully trusting my partner. 100%. Being in bad relationships has made it hard for me to trust people all of the time, but it is very hard to go through life always questioning your partners intentions - as long as they haven’t given you a real reason not to before. I guess my best advice would be, if you have had to forgive them for something and are moving on, do that. Hopefully, most cases you won’t have anything to worry about - so, trusting them 100% can be difficult because of past experiences, but do it… give yourself peace. Worry about it when the time comes. Don’t manifest the worst and give yourself anxiety over literally nothing.
14. Always highlighting the positive things in my life and not the negative. That’s really all I need to say on this one… choose positivity :)
15. No more ‘hoarding’ unnecessary sh*t. Get rid of it! Your tiny space can’t handle it and there is literally no need!! Put a box together and ship it to your families garage!!! Or wherever! You don’t need all of these things in your space… I promise. Declutter your life by starting with your living space.
16. Flexibility / work from home. This is subjective, obviously. But as a performer who is actively auditioning and traveling all over to do different jobs, having a virtual and flexible job has CHANGED THE GAME! My mental health, my audition life, my workouts. If this is something you can manage, find the right field and try your best to jump on it. This is definitely easier said than done… but a goal I would recommend :)
I’ve always hated when I feel like people are “preaching” at me. I’m sure some of my writing comes off that way, but truly, these are things I wish I’d realized and thought of sooner that feels shareable. Life is hard. I want to be part of a community that uplifts people and makes the environment around us stronger… so, I write. Just a start ;)
Til’ next time, babes x
Comments